Dimes, Supermarkets and Automobiles
By Jerome La Torre
Nicademiks Columnist

Frisco ballers got game,
on and off the court. J.Kidd
was born in the The City.

Don't you talk about my Momma!

First off, this article must begin with the first thing on my mind...dayum! Jumana Kidd is a fine ass woman. Jason Kidd must be from the Bay, and I'll bet that cat pops his collar every freakin' morning he wakes up
next her...Kidd definitely turned
around that New Jersey
franchise. The team is even
stronger than last year's squad
that reached the NBA finals,
but were pummeled by a solid
Laker gang clad in purple and
gold. What people may not
realize, however, is that this is
J. Kidd's final year of his Nets
contract. Come this summer,
the man, who many consider
to be the best point guard in
the league, is going to be a
free-agent...hmmm, could a
possible return to the Bay be
in the stars?? I'd package Arenas,
Dunleavy, and a couple burritos
from Fruitvale to get #5 back where
it all started...the East Bay.

Speaking of the Warriors...not too shabby fellas. Let it be known that the Oaktown ballers have theoretically been in just about every game this year, with perhaps their only blow-out loss coming from the Sacramento Kings back in December.

Lou Seal may be getting restless after a long winter, but keep your head up...pitchers, catchers, and injured players report to Spring training on February 13th. Can u dig it?!

Speaking of catchers...Pudge hasn't signed with anybody yet...matter of fact...there are a bunch of free agents out there still looking for places to hang their hats. Expect a free agent frenzy after the Super Bowl concludes. Let's hope Brian Sabean has something up his sleeve...c'mon now, tell Magowan to sell a few Safeway stores and bring another bat to the Bay.

The "Remember there are starving children in Africa" story of the day: Word on the streets is that Allen Iverson's mom was out and about one day running errands. After a long day of shopping she misplaced her vehicle. She simply could not remember where she parked. So, what does Mrs. Iverson do...she hails a cab and goes to the local auto dealership to get a new set of wheels!! A crazy, but true story courtesy of my reliable sources...guess nobody ever told Mrs. Answer to
"Remember there are starving children in Africa."

Speaking of automobiles...Lebron James has been rumored to have been seen driving a brand new Hummer. Controversy?? Shoot...let the kid have the car. Someone is making money off of him already (basketball tours, ESPN2 telecasts, pay per view tv broadcasts, etc.) So, don't knock him for driving a Hummer...but don't be surprised if his Mom forgets where she parked it and goes to buy a replacement.

The World is Yours.


Sucka Free writer Jerome La Torre, whose Big Book of Bay Area Slang will be published next spring in collaboration with E-40, will be appearing here regularly and irregularly during the offseason offering his weekly dose of sucka repellant.



- Tuesday, January 14, 2003







The Hummer Mentality

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